Dexter's Lab

2010.07.18.Sun.

Never know what I am doing...

Just... exhausted... more and more...

My mind, my head, my body, my heart...
There are too much pressure on me...

I know I make it, and I deserve it...

Actually, staying at this stage
I'm confused totally... about my future, my destiny, my life, my everything...
Who can tell me what mistakes have I done?
Just because I'm a freak?
Yes, I am.

I'm trying to pass my life smoothly, no... normally
But Time tells me it won't gonna be happened...
Gradually, I can not breathe, more specific, I just forget how to breathe, how to... be normal...
I lose the rules, the ways, the paths...

Sometimes, I hope I don't trust my intuition.
Like the drugs, it will erode your mind, your faith, even your own nature...
How horrible...

Till now, I'm exhausted.
I feel cold, smothered, filling with pressure, though I can not see it.
I feel lonely...

How do you guys say?
If no one understand u any more around the world...

Because u r a freak, you have to protect yourself, no matter what ways u take, leaving, hiding or escaping...

Sorry, I'm losing my way...
and gonna be worse and worse...

Once again?
Escape from here? Escape from Taiwan?...though I can...

I'm exhausted...

...extremely!